Defragmenting The Mind

Had a good walk today, which I'm always pleased about. Struggled a bit at first, but eventually found a nice constant frame of mind that wasn't too stressful and, crucially, found the discipline to stick with it. I'm not getting out much these days because mentally it's so exhausting, so it always feels like a genuine achievement when I come back in one piece. I do wish I didn't have to be "on" all the time, continually checking my state of mind to ensure that I'm not getting distracted. And it's especially hard when I get tense and distressed, because "getting distracted" and thinking from somewhere else is always my automatic response to danger. But fortunately I managed to keep a lid on everything today, so that's always good.

Yesterday I defragmented my hard drive as my computer's running slow. Didn't seem to make much difference though...pages are still loading slowly, and images are an absolute nightmare to load. I suspect that the problem might be the processor, which is a pain in the ass because I can't afford any computer repairs or upgrades til September at the earliest.

Anyway, I'm interested in the process of defragmentation because I'm wondering if it can yield any clues about how to "defragment the mind". It all seems a little complicated, but the jist of it seems to be that the defragmentation process compresses files to clear up free disk space. This is from the Wikipedia entry:

"A defragmentation program must move files around within the free space available to undo fragmentation. This is a memory intensive operation and cannot be performed on a file system with no free space. The reorganization involved in defragmentation does not change logical location of the files (defined as their location within the directory structure)."

Interesting. It seems that the key here is organization. Now I do like to be organized within my daily life, and for the most part I think I am pretty organized. But at the same time the artist and erstwhile class warrior in me has an innate mistrust of those who preach the virtues of organization, as I've always harbored the suspicion that what they're really preaching is little more than middle-class values. Organization is for everyone, but the creed of organization is strictly for the middle classes, as they will always use that creed as a justification to whip the rest of us into line. But as I type this, I am well aware that it might be little more than childish paranoia. And I'm mainly going by how it is here in the UK, where the remnants of the class system are still very much in place. It may be completely different in America and the rest of the world. But if there's one thing that separates the middle and working classes in this country, then I think it's this creed of organization. The working classes are just as capable of organizing themselves in a practical sense. But the middle classes have been better educated in the importance of organization, and consequently they value it more.

Anyway, my inner class warrior's distracting me. So is organization the key to defragmenting the mind? Well I would imagine it has a part to play...out of chaos comes order and all that. But the trouble with too much organization is that it creates too many things to worry about, and too many checklists to tick. One of the biggest problems that I have is that for every strategy, I have an opposite and equal counter-strategy. You know..."if this then do this, if that then do that". I just want to not have to think about this stuff!